this is the great adventure

"O Lord, You have searched me and known me. . . . Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way." ~Psalm 139:1, 23-24

This has been the ongoing cry of my heart for the past month or so. I'm realizing how deeply rooted my flesh is... how adamant it is to stay... to dominate and control. But my Jesus has overcome my flesh thru His death on the cross. And He is the Victor, my Savior, and the Grace by which I stand. I'm realizing how many Amalekites are in my life, yet with that, I also have a peace that the Lord will defeat my enemies, as I press into Him, and YIELD, and live an outward life.

The major areas the Lord stuck His finger on during my time in Colorado were 1) fear and 2) obedience. He had been asking me to step... to move forward... to dive into Him. And I was holding back. I shared with the set-apart team of girls the first night during prayers that I knew there was something in my heart holding back... only I couldn't identify it. Annie looked at me with a huge grin and said, "The Lord WILL bring those things to the surface this weekend." That hindrance was fear. And the Lord removed it in Colorado, as He called me to step out in obedience. It still comes out as I keep stepping forward, but now I can identify it and cry out for His perfect Love to cast it out, and for His grace to obey.

A practical step forward was in beginning a young women's Bible Study and Discipleship in the valley I live in. The Lord had been prompting me to do so since I moved here, but I was fighting Him in fear rather than yielding and obeying. So, I came home, and I took Lisa (a new friend the Lord brought into my life here who is also sold-out and set-apart young woman) out to lunch and poured out what the Lord had been doing in my heart. It ended with, "So, I think the Lord wants to have a girl's bible study and discipleship for the girls in this valley. I'm terrified. What are your thoughts?" Lisa laughed long and hard. Turns out (this is so God!) that He's been laying the same thing on her heart for a year and a half. So we spent time in prayer and talked with the gals at our respective churches, and gave it to the Lord, saying, "Yes, Lord... lead us if this is Your desire." And He has!! The one night we both had free, was the UNANIMOUS night that worked for the young ladies. We prayed for a location in town, since both of us live off the main drag. And the Lord provided a local diner, the owners are Christians and offered it to us free of charge ('cause the close early Monday nights). The first night, we went around and asked each of the gals why they had come... it was incredible to hear them express their hearts and the Lord's leading up to this point. He's been orchestracting this study time and each person in it for months now! He has been leading the whole way, and it's been quite the adventure!! I am beyond excited to see His Spirit move and work in these young women's lives. It's powerful... and this is JUST THE BEGINNING!!

I was supposed to teach the lesson last Monday, and I had planned to teach on Loneliness (I heard this expressed from each of the girls the week before... feeling like they were the only one in their circle of influence willing to be set-apart). I had all the elements for the lesson, but it just wasn't fitting together. Sunday afternoon/evening, I wrestled with the lesson and with the Lord, 'cause I couldn't get it to gel. Monday morning, I continued working on the lesson and finally, around noon, went to my mom saying, "I don't know what I'm supposed to teach, 'cause it's not Loneliness." She reminded me when I came home from Discipleship Training, I'd mentioned how I felt like I'd never truly understood "the Basics" for myself. Like the true meaning of grace, and the regenerated life. And Historic Christianity versus Modern Christianity. She said, "Maybe you're supposed to start with the basics." I went back upstairs and pulled out session #1. As I prayed over the lesson and the Lord guided, two hours later, the lesson was completed. The Lord really just took over once I finally let it go, and expressed His heart. It was humbling.

So that's the major stuff the Lord's been doing lately. I'm also doing an ongoing study on prayer... which has been very eye-opening. I'm realizing how much depth there is to prayer, and how VITAL and significant prayer is to the Christian life. And also how little I pray compared to how much I should. It's been an exciting study, and I feel like I've just only scratched the surface. I want to go deeper... to know the raw power of prayer. I'm confident this'll come up quite often in the future. :-)

That's it for now. I am so encouraged by the updates I read from each of you. Praise God for His mighty power and the working of His Holy Spirit!! Much love in Jesus to you all. Keep pressing in! May He continute to pour out His grace on you!

Bethany